Near Death
by What's-Yer-Offer
Summary: Needless to say, it's Yukari's job to kill the spiders. YukAmo. One Shot


**I've got eight minutes before I have to get ready for work..,**

**Lemme just rant real fast.**

**This was the _cutest_ anime I had ever seen. I would recommend it to anyone in a HEARTBEAT.**

**Of course I fell in love with YukAmo...**

**Expect a Kagura/Tomo/Yomi story from me too! TOO CUTE.**

**I don't own anything.**

* * *

Yukari let out an agitated sigh. "We're going to miss the bell with how _slow_ you're going." She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the road ahead of them.

"We wouldn't be running late if _someone_ could wake up on time _like an adult_." Nyamo retorted. Her knuckles turned white from gripping the steering wheel harshly. "Honestly, do I have to wake you up every morning?"

"I wouldn't mind." Yukari grinned at her. She watched her friend scowl and she laughed.

Some days, it was too easy to tease Minamo about their "relationship." The eccentric English teacher reached over to put a hand on Minamo's knee affectionately.

"Get your hand off me."

"Geez, Nyamo. You don't have to-"

She was interrupted by Minamo screaming to the high heavens, "KAMISAMA."

Yukari flinched away from her lover and put a hand to her head.

"What the fu-"

"T-There's a sp-spider on the-the windshield!"

Her heart might have stopped for a couple moments. Yukari pushed against her seat, trying to get as far as possible from the dashboard. "Shit! Where?"

And then she saw it. The creepy eight-legged bug was about the size of the pad of her thumb and scampering on the windshield in front of Minamo.

The solution was obvious.

"Nyamo! Turn on the wipers!"

The PE teacher, looking sickly pale, nodded numbly and hit the button.

The wiper passed harmlessly over the spider.

They cursed in unison. "_IT'S INSIDE._"

This was bad, Yukari realized. If there was anything her brave Minamo was afraid of, it was spiders.

She kept her eyes glued to the spider and put a calming hand on her lover's thigh. Minamo was trying to focus on driving, but it wasn't working. The cars around her had no idea that she was a time bomb. She was speeding slightly and hugging the right line.

Minamo couldn't look past the spider to see the road. After a couple seconds of tense silence, the tomboy whined. "Yukari! Kill it!"

"It's on your side!"

"Dammit Yukari! Kill it!"

"With what?" Yukari hissed, "My notes? The back of my hand?"

"With your shoe." Minamo growled.

Yukari looked stuck by that idea. "Oh yeah."

The spider was still crawling everywhere. It would get close to the dashboard and Minamo would whine. It would move up to the top of the windshield and Minamo was sure she was on the verge of cardiac arrest.

Meanwhile, Yukari was wrestling to get her shoe off.

"Do you think crashing into a telephone pole would kill it?"

And it was sounding like a plausible plan of action to the PE teacher. Yukari took the threat seriously and finally managed to slip her shoe off.

Minamo looked close to tears as the spider continued to roam the glass without a care in the world.

Hesitantly, Yukari unbuckled her seatbelt.

Minamo heard the familiar 'click' and felt a new panic rise. "Yukari! Don't unbuckle! We could crash any minute!"

And it really was a wonder that they hadn't yet. Traffic was moving steadily, which meant that cars were weaving in and out of lanes.

"Shut up Nyamo!" Yukari knew exactly what she was risking. She folded her legs under herself and sat up, "I'm trying to kill this damned spider!"

It honestly wasn't a good idea though. A taxi cut them off at the last minute and Minamo had to slam on the breaks.

Yukari's side flew into the dashboard. She managed to avoid hitting her head barely. "God damn."

"Yukari!"

"Okay, nevermind." She held her side tenderly and sat back down.

"Just buckle up please…" Minamo sucked in a breath. "We're almost to school anyway."

* * *

Kagura and Yomi were out in front of the school, enjoying the cool air and waiting for Tomo to get there. Yomi had taken a seat on the bench, while Kagura stood behind her and played with her long hair. She had just said something to make Yomi blush when a car sped into the parking lot.

"Hey, isn't that Miss Kurosawa's car?" Kagura asked.

They watched the familiar blue car fly into a parking spot crookedly and stop on a dime as soon as it was in the line.

"Hey, I think you're right."

The driver's side door was thrown open and Minamo jumped out, yelling for Yukari. The two girls watched bewildered as Yukari quickly exited the passenger side and hopped on one foot to her fellow teacher's aide.

"What the hell?"

The two teachers were screaming. Yukari was halfway in the car, cursing something's mother and beating the snot out of whatever was on the windshield. Repeated slapping filled the air. Minamo had her hands clasped together against her chest and was worriedly peeking into the car.

"Uh…" Yomi glanced over her shoulder to look at Kagura, who shrugged.

Yukari gave a cry of success and relief. Minamo opened the back seat door and retrieved some paper towels for her friend. They watched their homeroom teacher reach to the dashboard. Like the paper towels in her hand were on fire, she ran to the nearest trash can. After disposing of the offending trash, she took a deep breath.

They turned their attention back to Minamo as soon as Yukari started crying. It was too uncomfortable to watch. Their PE teacher was beating Yukari's shoe against the pavement and then wiping the sole along the small patch of grass next to her car.

Yukari hobbled over to her friend, who took her into her arms. She managed to stop Yukari's tears.

Yomi and Kagura were at a loss for words.

They watched Yukari pull away to put her shoe back on. She swiped the back of her hand against her eyes, clearing her face of any remaining tears. Minamo kept a soothing hand on her back and led them into school.

Both teachers stopped in their tracks when they noticed their two students looking at them like they were insane. They had witnessed the whole thing…

Instead of explaining themselves, the two teachers passed by without a word. Yomi couldn't help but think they looked like they had just been to war.

As soon as Yukari and Minamo were out of hearing range, Kagura asked "I wonder what that was about."


End file.
